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Thanks. I'll start with the alternator check to rule that out first.

When checking the current draw between the battery and battery cable, how long do you think it takes for all the normal systems which draw current to shut down?
You are right to check the simple things first (e.g. alternator check). One simple thing that I would caution you to not overlook before you start chasing things, is the possibility that you just got a bad battery. It's not that unusual you know. Just take it in & tell them it's not holding a charge & chances are they'll just put in a new one at no charge, given it's only 2 months old.
If you can get that done, then you've removed one of your variables.... and can wait to see if this "newer" battery exhibits the same problems.... if not, you know it was the battery. If it does, then you can chase your current leak. (or you can go ahead & chase it now if you enjoy that kind of thing.... some like the challenge); and if you find no leak, then you've just gone about the same exercise in the reverse order. Good Luck either way (I'd be checking out that battery first, WITHOUT changing anything else, like your remote starter). :)
 

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Let me start by saying that I know I could be ALL WET with regards to my skepticism....I am no modern car electronics expert, BUT: Claims of failure due to driving a vehicle only X distance (1.5 miles in this case) sound ridiculous to me. I'm just sayin'. If the state of modern car electrics/electronics is such that we can't rely on battery being sustained due to short trips only, then we have taken gigantic leaps backward from reliability in that regard even 50 years ago. In small town America, it's not uncommon at all for folks to make short trips (a few blocks) with regularity.... some NEVER driving farther than that. I find it impossible to comprehend that a current designed vehicle will not sustain a battery if driven only 1 1/2 miles per start. That's just my incredulity at this prospect. I have relatives in Nebraska that live that existence, with no "special" battery issues as a result.
I understand that once a battery is drained (lights on or whatever), it has to be recharged fully, but a fully charged battery should not require long periods of alternator operation to sustain it's level. I guess I'd have to see it to believe it. I'm just sayin'.......

I firmly believe OP has a fault in his/her system.
 

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Not often easy to glean from battery manufacturer information these days is the AmpHour rating. used to be quite common and assisted in these kinds of examinations. Now they like to tell you the cold cranking amps which is a big and impressive number.

say your battery had a 80 amp hour ratting as is common for a size 24. you could in theory produce 80 amps for 1 hour. In truth it would not be that good, but closer to its ability would be 8 amps for 10 hours. This is useful just to determine how long you could run a certain load if you had a fully charged battery and did not replenish the charge. At any rate the bigger the AH rating, the longer you can deplete it before your battery dies.

If you look at the current draw from a starter cranking an engine in sub zero weather it could easily be in the 200 amp range or more. add to it 7-10 amps for headlights, 1-2 for tail, 1-2 for running, 1 amp for instruments, 2-4 for fan 7-9 for heated mirrors, 2-3 for fuel pump, 1-2 for the radio and a hand full for the other things that are running in these trucks and pretty soon you are talking real amps. tough to calculate without real time monitoring and some software is tough, as there is always transient draws and cycling of others, turn signals, horn, ac compressor cycling etc. But at the end of your 1.5 mile trip you have produced produced a certain number of amps and used a certain number amps. Like Speedlever, I find it hard to imagine the battery ever getting charged fully.

Don't know the rating of the alternator, but what ever it is, say 75 amps, that is not at 1500 rpm that you spend most of your time driving 1.5 miles to work. expect the output to be down in the 20-30 amp range. Easy to see your alternator might be just keeping up and not replenishing your battery at all or just a little.

I think most of our examples are anecdotal and with a battery with 80AH capacity, we could drive weeks depleting it a little at a time and not notice. The steady discharge would be masked by the reserve battery capacity and the occasional 15 minutes at highway speed trips we forget about. These trips where your recharge well exceeds your usage, will do a lot to get your battery charged.
Your hypothesis & logic are sound, but I would seriously question your numbers. I do not have anything better to offer, so my challenge is mute, except for the empirical example already given that many, many people live this life of "not driving enough to charge battery" w/o suffering net battery drain. I guess I would agree that the notion of "short trips killed my battery" is indeed anecdotal.... just as my observation of "short trips don't kill the battery".
I'd really like someone with real numbers to chime in if anybody out there has them. For instance actual starter draw on a cold day, and alternator recovery time (even at idle) to make up for that draw. I suspect the situation is not as dire as described above. For instance, our alternator puts out something in the neighborhood of 90 amps or more peak (probably around 2000 engine RPM & above), but is likely AT LEAST still in the 50 range at 1500RPM, and I would guess still not that much less at idle.... but now I'm guessing. And those draw-down ratings you list ARE amp-hours... so divide by 60 to get amps per minute. Only the starter is creating a big all-at-once draw. So yes, I'd like to see real numbers if there are any sparkys out there who can give a real educated estimate, or better yet who have measured the starter draw & the alternator output.
Don't forget also that the alternator is regulated to generate more charge when the battery is low or current draw is high.
LASTLY, my speculative skepticism above is only held for stock RLs. If you've added high draw aftermarket components (like a high power audio amp), then all bets are off, given you are eating into design margins.
All in all, I'm a believer in numbers, but w/o those I'll go with real world observations that say short trips alone don't kill your battery.

Here is some very interesting related reading.... I don't vouch for any of it, but it sounds valid.... certainly interesting; LOTS of numbers, albeit many are approximations.
http://physics.stackexchange.com/questions/57794/calculating-engine-starter-s-energy-use
 

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Interesting first hand experience Moo. I wonder if having a block heater effects this at all? Most folks I know in this kind of weather / small town midwest keep their vehicles garaged (not heated) but always use block heater in the winter.
 

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Check this thread as a possibility: http://www.ridgelineownersclub.com/forums/showthread.php?t=87865

Despite its title it does cover a battery drain possibility...

Roak
Here is one pertinent lift from that thread, in case it helps anyone: (excessive draw was A/C compressor relay in this case)

"Given the guidelines in this thread, I checked for parasitic draw on the battery and measured about 0.25A. Removed the A/C compressor relay and it dropped to about 0.06A, Left the relay out, drove to the Honda dealer and picked up a new relay (~$10), plugged it in and the parasitic load stayed at 0.06A."
 
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